Life Advice
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Ask Anna: How do I ask out someone without it getting weird?
Dear Anna,
I could use your help. I rent a parking space during the workweek from a very charming woman who lives in the building across from my office. A coworker connected us through the doorman when I was looking for a space.
From the first time we spoke, there was a … familiarity. She asked if we’d met before. She’s always been kind ...Read more
Asking Eric: Longtime friends excluded from group trip
Dear Eric: We are four couples, everyone in the group except me has the same birth year. For their 60th 10 years ago, we planned a trip together and had a great time.
My husband and one of the men are cousins. As the years passed, his cousin wanted to remain close and wanted to get together at least once a month. Sometimes one of the other ...Read more
Balancing Respect in an Interfaith Relationship
Dear Annie: I never thought I would be writing to an advice column, but here I am, because my heart is full and my mind is spinning.
I am a Catholic woman in my early 30s, and I have fallen deeply in love with a wonderful man who is Jewish. He is kind, thoughtful, funny and steady in a way that makes me feel safe. He remembers the little ...Read more
Asking Eric: Cane-user tired of encouraging comments about walking
Dear Eric: I have a variety of orthopedic issues, some chronic and some temporary. I use a cane, a walker or a wheelchair when I'm out of the house, depending on how I feel that day, or what sort of activity I'm planning to take part in.
Now that I've reached a certain age, I interact a lot with people who are getting new hips and knees. They ...Read more
Sending St. Patrick's Day Blessings
Dear Readers: Wishing you all a very Happy St. Patrick's Day! Today has a funny way of sneaking past the noise and landing somewhere tender. Yes, there are parades and pints and an impressive amount of green, but underneath all that is something quieter: a tradition of wishing one another well.
That might sound small, but it isn't. A good ...Read more
Asking Eric: Mother refuses to accept the facts of cancer diagnosis
Dear Eric: My 87-year-old mother has pancreatic cancer. My husband and I moved out of state to live with her for four months while she went through radiation and enough of the recovery for her to live independently.
Her cancer is back after about a six-month reprieve. The doctors have said she cannot have more treatments due to health and age. ...Read more
I Didn't Sign Up to Host Spring Breakers
Dear Annie: I adore my cousins, I really do. We grew up together, and when they suggested coming to stay with us for a long weekend, I was genuinely excited. I pictured late-night laughs, good meals, maybe a hike, maybe some time catching up without phones buzzing every two seconds.
Instead, it turned into "Spring Break: Middle-Aged Edition."...Read more
Millennial Life: The Philosophy of Hope and Destiny
I'm the one who ends up getting the emails when no one else answers. This time, it was suckering me into taking a board role because the original email request was responded to by crickets. Of course I'd help.
The woman who had filled the role was winding down, not out of desire, but just from the weight of days that turned into decades. She's ...Read more
Asking Eric: Friend’s sullen son makes visits a chore
Dear Eric: I have a good friend of more than 30 years who has two teenage sons. One son is friendly and welcoming whenever we go to their home or when he comes to ours. Her other teenage son is oftentimes rude and incommunicative.
For example, we recently went to their home, and her son wore his headphones the entire time. He came in, ate, and ...Read more
The Grass Is a Lot Longer on the Other Side
Dear Annie: I've lived in my home for eight years, and it's always felt like a peaceful place to land. My husband and I have put a lot of care into it, not because we're perfect but because we enjoy sitting outside and making our yard feel welcoming. We planted a few shrubs, we keep the grass trimmed, and I love tending to my small flower bed ...Read more
Asking Eric: Moving in with boyfriend complicated by bully brother
Dear Eric: After more than a year together, my boyfriend and I are planning to move in together with his brother. Originally, I was planning to move away since I'm graduating college and received some very cool opportunities, but after meeting him I was willing to put my career aspirations on hold in order to see where our relationship would go....Read more
Loyal for a Lifetime, Disappointed for Decades
Dear Annie: I moved 600 miles away from my hometown 40 years ago, but keeping up a relationship with my parents (who've since passed) and my four siblings was always important to me. Family was paramount to my mother, and she instilled that same value in me.
I traveled back home countless times, eventually with my husband and two children, ...Read more
Asking Eric: Parents disinherit son for no reason
Dear Eric: My mother-in-law and father-in-law won two prizes in a raffle one Christmas. We were shown these prizes. Twelve months later, we traveled 2,500 miles to visit them for Christmas again. On Christmas morning, my husband and I received these raffle prizes for Christmas presents. We don't believe they had forgotten that they had shown us ...Read more
When Grocery Lists Meet Rocket Ships
Dear Annie: I recently introduced my 62-year-old husband to emojis, and now I fear I've made a huge mistake. Every text I receive -- whether it's "Pick up milk" or "Your sister called" -- is followed by a winking face, a heart and, inexplicably, a rocket ship. He signs grocery lists with smiley faces. He even sent our plumber three ...Read more
Asking Eric: Fitness-class nemesis won’t stop pestering
Dear Eric: I am a recently retired woman who is appreciating my morning routine at the gym. I love the group exercise classes. My issue is with one woman who insists on counting very loudly with the instructor, slipping in loud singing with the music and thinking she is entertaining during class.
She does it during every class twice a week. The...Read more
Too Neighborly for My Own Good
Dear Annie: My neighbor has taken "borrowing a cup of sugar" to ridiculous levels. In the past six months, she's borrowed my ladder, my hedge clippers, two baking pans and, most recently, my patio chairs for her daughter's graduation party. She always promises to return things "tomorrow," but I usually have to go ask, and sometimes they come ...Read more
Ask Anna: He says it's not cheating -- but he's still on dating apps
Dear Anna,
My boyfriend and I have been together for a little over two years. We live together with his two boys and my son. About a year ago, I found out he had been cheating on me. He was messaging women on dating apps and Craigslist, and he was also talking to and possibly hooking up with trans women. I found emails and texts with several ...Read more
Single File: Community as Connection
Linking yourself to the community is the next step in widening your circle of connectedness. By joining a voluntary organization or international agency (whichever seems more important to you and seems to need you more), by manning a hotline for a battered women's shelter or by helping to organize an international fast day to raise awareness of ...Read more
Ask Dating Coach Erika: Can I take a break from my relationship?
Another day, another set of dating questions. Have any of these been on your mind lately?
Q: Is it OK to ask for/take a break from the relationship I’m in if I am feeling stressed out by it?
A: If your relationship is making you feel stressed out, taking a break will not get to the bottom of it.
This is really where you have to do some ...Read more
Asking Eric: Girlfriend’s neighborly conversations irk boyfriend
Dear Eric: My girlfriend (30) and I (35) can’t seem to agree about this one thing. She’s friendly with her male neighbor in her apartment building. They don’t go to each other’s apartments, but they’ll say hi in the halls and chat. I don’t like this. I’ve asked her to stop and she won’t. Am I wrong?
– One-woman Man
Dear Man: ...Read more
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