Life Advice
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Are Condolences A Burden?
DEAR MISS MANNERS: I'm sure you are aware that grief is one of the toughest emotions to process. I therefore believe those grieving should be given a break and allowed to grieve in the manner that best suites them.
What a horrible burden it is on the grieving to have hanging over them the responsibility of responding to condolence letters if ...Read more
The Blame Game in Parenting
Dear Annie: I often read essays about how parenting comes full circle, how the greatest accomplishment of all is raising children who grow into capable, successful adults. That sounds fine and wonderful, and I am truly happy for those families. But I cannot help wondering, what about the rest of us?
Some of us have worked just as hard, ...Read more
Loving Widow Ready To Move On From Her Loss
DEAR ABBY: I lost my husband two months ago after a long, debilitating illness. I loved him very much, and the loss was very difficult, although not unexpected.
After his funeral, an old friend called me offering condolences. He had lost his wife last year after a long illness, and he understood what I had been through. We both had lost spouses...Read more
Milennial Life: You Say Don't Poke the Bear, but the Bear Is Already Here
The city in which I serve as a councilor is not a sanctuary city; however, it adopted a welcoming city solution back in 2017. It affirmed us as an immigrant-friendly city and made clear that our police should not detain or arrest people based on their nationality or ethnicity, nor seek proof of a person's citizenship status, and should not ...Read more

Asking Eric: Neighbors’ car ruins the view
Dear Eric: My husband and I live in a beautiful, gated community with wonderful neighbors. Recently the home next door to us sold and new neighbors moved in. The new neighbors are a very friendly couple and my husband, and I welcomed them to the neighborhood with a small housewarming gift.
Since they moved in several months ago, they have ...Read more
Boundaries Are Not Selfish
Dear Annie: I am a 57-year-old woman who has had many problems with my sister over the years. When my mother was alive, I would call to talk with her, but my sister often answered the phone. If she did not like the way I spoke or the tone of my voice, she would simply hang up on me.
On the day we buried my father, her children tried to pick a...Read more
Man's Job Change Opened A Disastrous Chapter For Family
DEAR ABBY: My husband, "Andy," and I have been together 25 years, married for 16. We have three kids ages 14, 11 and 9. Our marriage has always been a happy one. Andy began a government job five years ago, and after two years, he was traveling a lot.
Once he started traveling so often, I had a hard time adjusting to being everything for my kids...Read more

Asking Eric: Wife’s secret expenses strain marriage
Dear Eric: I have been married to a wonderful woman for more than 50 years. About five years ago, I discovered that she spends more than $4,000 a year on vitamins and supplements. She hid these purchases from me by putting a small amount of the bill on a credit card and paying the rest in cash.
She buys them from her chiropractor who has ...Read more
Friends Squirm Out Of Plans They Agreed To
DEAR HARRIETTE: My wife and I, along with a few family friends, needed to travel to Canada for a funeral. We decided it would be more economical to drive, so I booked the rental vehicle. Our friends let us know that they'd send us their contribution before we hit the road. The day before our departure, they called, saying they might just take a ...Read more
Can I Decline To Be Introduced To Someone?
DEAR MISS MANNERS: I enjoy having friends and acquaintances from different walks of life, and have found unexpected kinship with people who hold beliefs very different from my own. In other words, I try not to be judgmental. My natural inclination when meeting someone is to find common ground.
However, I recently found myself in a situation ...Read more
Held Hostage by Fear
Dear Annie: I suffer from severe anxiety over everything. I am and have been on medication for some time and I do see a therapist, but nothing seems to help. I have my share of issues, but my mind always jumps to the worst possible outcomes.
In December, I had a hemorrhage. The doctors gave me pain medicine and told me it was colitis after a ...Read more
Middle-Age Son Refuses To Be Honest With Parents
DEAR ABBY: My son has trouble telling the truth. He was getting up late, dressing for work, leaving and coming back early. When my husband and I asked him about having a job, he said he had one. When we asked him to show us his paycheck, he fumbled around on his phone, then he confessed that he had no job. He said he has been at the library ...Read more

Asking Eric: Girlfriend accuses boyfriend of cheating with church friend
Dear Eric: I’m a 61-year-old single man. I’m disabled and, until their passing, lived with my parents. About 25 years ago, my parents and I became friendly with a woman – I’ll call her “M” – and her husband, “P” through activities at our church.
After my father passed away, M invited me to lunch. She knew I was alone and ...Read more
Daughter Mad She Can't Attend Concert With Friends
DEAR HARRIETTE: My teenage daughter is upset with me because I told her she couldn't go to a concert with her friends. The show is in a nearby city, and while she insists everyone else's parents are letting them go, I don't feel comfortable with her being out so late in such a large, unsupervised crowd. She's 15, and the concert would end well ...Read more
Just Write The Darn Notes, Already
DEAR MISS MANNERS: What do you do when the duty to write thank-you notes overwhelms any genuine sense of gratitude?
In my own upbringing, reciprocity and eagerness to give were prized over the finer points of expressing gratitude, and I confess that my gratitude muscle has suffered as a result. I am trying to strengthen it by practicing writing...Read more
When Ambition and Emotions Clash
Dear Annie: I've been dating a man, "Daniel," for about a year. He's kind, reliable and has a great relationship with his family. I care about him a lot, but there's something that keeps nagging at me. He's never been very ambitious. He works a steady job, pays his bills, but doesn't seem interested in growing professionally. He often says he'...Read more
Elderly Mom's Change In Attitude Stumps Her Family
DEAR ABBY: My mom is in her early 80s. More and more often lately, she seems to be avoiding seeing me and my siblings. It wasn't always like this. She would let me, my husband and our kids stay with her when we visited. Even last year, when she fell and injured herself, she let me stay with her for a couple of days to help out.
My siblings have...Read more

Asking Eric: Longtime boyfriend has dream wedding plan but won’t propose
Dear Eric: My good friend has been with her boyfriend for more than 20 years. She finally moved into his house after her mom died a year and a half ago. They attend each other’s family events – weddings, funerals, birthdays, sports events, work parties – and he tells her he loves her.
He’s had every detail of his future wedding...Read more
Couple Goes Over Options For Expanding Family
DEAR HARRIETTE: I had a difficult first pregnancy that took a serious toll on my physical and mental health. From severe morning sickness to complications that required hospitalization, the experience left me exhausted and anxious about the possibility of going through it again. Because of this, I've decided that I don't want to have another ...Read more
Another Reason To Avoid Cruise Ships
DEAR MISS MANNERS: We are frequent cruisers. That means we share spaces such as elevators, dining rooms, theaters, lounges, etc., with fellow cruisers we don't know. We have always had pleasant times interacting with others.
On our most recent cruise, we encountered an older couple -- sometimes in the elevators, sometimes in our top-tier lounge...Read more
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