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Q: I'm concerned about my children growing up in a culture that seems to be increasingly selfish and entitled. It seems like narcissistic behavior is on the rise. Is there anything I can do to shield my kids from developing these negative traits themselves?

Jim: I completely understand your concerns. Our staff counselors say that although a genetic predisposition to narcissism may exist, it is most commonly understood as a learned behavior.

Renowned psychologists Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend identify two parenting factors that can contribute to the development of narcissism. Parents may: 1) ignore the bad and 2) fail to limit the grandiose perceptions of their child. Both lead to an unrealistic, over-exaggerated sense of self-worth that impacts all future relationships.

Admittedly, the first few years of a child's life are usually characterized by "narcissistic thinking" (including a lack of awareness of others, insensitivity, an all-knowing attitude and lack of interpersonal boundaries). But this should be a temporary state called "toddlerhood." For the narcissist, however, these traits continue into adulthood if he's not taught consideration of and empathy toward others, an accurate assessment of his own mistakes, anger management, boundaries and interpersonal skills.

To help prevent narcissism in your child, consider the following:

-- Avoid anything that suggests to your child he is superior and deserves every advantage in life.

-- Allow your child to experience the natural consequences of his actions, while providing clear feedback and helping him maintain his dignity.

-- Listen well and provide a safe, mutually respectful home and community environment.

-- Provide age-appropriate guidance in establishing boundaries.

-- Encourage your child to develop his potential, thoughtfully evaluate choices and value interpersonal relationships.

-- Affirm your child for consistently positive and selfless behaviors.

-- Finally, model unconditional love while helping your child come to grips with, and take responsibility for, wrongdoings -- including the need to ask for and accept forgiveness.

Q: I'm recently "single-again." With virtually no "in-person" options in my circle of acquaintances, I've decided to try online dating. I thought it would make things easier -- but it's actually overwhelming! I can't even decide where to start. Help!?

Dr. Greg Smalley, Vice President, Marriage & Family Formation: Many singles try online dating sites for one simple reason -- they feel they need more choices than they're finding through traditional dating. After all, we've all been conditioned to think "the more choices the better," right?

However, a lot of online daters discover that too many choices can be as big a problem as not enough. After countless evenings clicking through hundreds of dating profiles, they feel less capable of making a decision than they were when they started.

This indecisiveness is so common that researchers have coined a term for it: "decision paralysis." When you have unlimited choices, the fear that you'll make a wrong decision can paralyze you from making any decision at all. Before long, your hopes for romance can be lost to anxiety and unhappiness.

There are a couple of practical solutions for conquering decision paralysis. The first is to mostly stick with traditional dating and allow the availability of people within your social circles to naturally restrict your options.

But if you like the benefits of online dating, objectively apply the decision-making filters you rely on every day. Character always trumps appearance, so narrow your choices based on those traits that matter most to you. You might also consider enlisting a dating service to select people with whom you're most compatible.

Either way, move carefully, prayerfully and SLOWLY -- taking time to really get to know prospective dates in many various settings. Listen to feedback from friends and family who know you well.

For more insights into purposeful single living, see Boundless.org.

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Jim Daly is a husband and father, an author, and president of Focus on the Family and host of the Focus on the Family radio program. Catch up with him at jimdalyblog.focusonthefamily.com or at Facebook.com/JimDalyFocus.

Copyright 2025 Focus On The Family. (This feature may not by reproduced or distributed electronically, in print or otherwise without written permission of Focus on the Family.)

COPYRIGHT 2025 Andrews McMeel Syndication. This feature may not be reproduced or distributed electronically, in print or otherwise without the written permission of Andrews McMeel Syndication.