ArcaMax

Dear Eric: Three of us attended high school together and remained close friends for many decades, even though we sometimes lived quite far from each other.

A few years ago, “Beth” had some medical problems that were exacerbated by COVID, and she had to retire unexpectedly from a fulfilling job. She fell into a deep depression and withdrew ...Read more

Dear Eric: I am 72 and a father of five. Over time, my relationship with my wife has become very difficult. She is loudly critical, demanding and nagging, holding back all kinds of affection.

Meaningful conversations between my wife and me are thwarted by her unwillingness to engage in rational discussions. Whenever I attempt to convey my ...Read more

Dear Eric: About three years ago, I found out I have a neural immune skin issue where I break out with bumps which scab over and are very sore and painful. About a year ago, this condition broke out on my scalp, and it is not healing and going away. I have some areas of alopecia, and the sores and scabs are very painful.

As a result, the ...Read more

Dear Eric: My 23-year-old stepdaughter moved in with us four years ago. She leaves for days on end and doesn’t let her dad know where she is. We both worry. She has been gone for months at a time.

A couple months ago, I ventured into her bedroom because I had an electrician coming and I found a disgusting mess: garbage and dirty clothes ...Read more

Dear Eric: My 15-year-old daughter has a host of diagnoses that my husband and I are trying to navigate. We are receiving service and advice from a psychiatrist, a therapist, an occupational therapist and a speech therapist.

My problem is that I am constantly receiving rude comments and unwanted advice about my daughter. These fall into two ...Read more

Dear Eric: My sister can’t get past the fact that we’re sending our kids to a local public school instead of to the charter school that she sends her kids to. We normally have a good relationship, but this has really become a sticking point for her. It feels like I need to defend public schools every time I see or talk to her, which is nuts....Read more

Dear Eric: I guess I’m tired of reading all the problems people have with their marriages or children or coworkers.

Here’s my problem: none. How do I stay engaged, feel completely fulfilled and happy with my life?

– Happy Life

Dear Life: My answer is going to sound simple, maybe, but I’ve found it to be one of the most complex ...Read more

Dear Eric: My brother-in-law (41) is the last of four siblings to get married. He invited the family to his wedding. However, this is a destination wedding, and he said he would like his nephews and nieces to participate in the ceremony, but that the children had to be taken to their babysitters after the ceremony and not be present at the ...Read more

Dear Eric: Recently my parents shared how their estate will be divided when they pass. They have worked hard and lived a modest life, and it goes without saying that they are entitled to do as they please with their estate.

In sharing how they intend to divide their estate, my parents informed me that I would not receive a share since “I don�...Read more

Dear Eric: I love my wife of 29 years so deeply.

Recently, she took a tumble down the stairs when going down to use the bathroom. She broke her pelvis, is in excruciating pain, and has lost all mobility.

While I feel awful for what she is going through, this is an awful lot on me as well. She is very petite and slim, and I am still a tall, ...Read more

Dear Eric: For years I was in a toxic, abusive relationship. Fortunately, I ended it and my family and friends supported me along the way. Now I'm in a new relationship with a healthy person but the tables have turned. Through couples and individual therapy, I have realized that, due to an undiagnosed neurodivergence and childhood trauma, I ...Read more

Dear Eric: My brother just released a book and as I was reading his acknowledgments in the online sample, I was blown away that he disclosed a very personal incident that happened when we were children.

I have been going to therapy sessions for years discussing things that happened to me as a child. It was very shocking to read this and caused ...Read more

Dear Eric: I have two sisters. “Betty” and I had a serious falling out a few years ago. She won’t speak to me. She has cast herself as the victim in a situation where my other sister’s husband became abusive to me. My heart is broken. Betty and I were very close all our lives before that happened.

Betty has two sons. She is estranged ...Read more

Dear Eric: My boss is what could be called a “functioning alcoholic,” which in this case means that, in spite of having a severe drinking problem, he manages to hold down a job, even while actively drunk.

Over the years, I have been phasing out the act of “looking the other way.” My refusal to accept his drinking has led him to cast his...Read more

Dear Eric: I have a lady I consider a friend, but I notice that she only calls me when it's convenient for her. I call her to talk, and she makes everything about her. I am really considering stopping talking to her.

She says she doesn't have any friends. She is in her 70s and I'm in my 50s and I have said something to her about the problem....Read more

Dear Eric: I sent an out-of-town relative a Sympathy Box from Amazon when her husband died and never received a thank you. I know she got it because I saw the picture on her porch.

She’s the kind of person that knows the rules of etiquette. Should I email/text her to ask if she received it, or let it go? If I ask, how do I do it politely?

�...Read more

Dear Eric: I have two friends with whom I frequently engage in trekking; we always have great chats and fun. But I noticed when offering an invitation to come stay in our holiday home, approximately two hours’ drive away, the replies were quite muted or passive but polite. Responding with their absence of enthusiasm left the moment “hanging....Read more

Dear Eric: A close family member who was a beloved community member died unexpectedly on my birthday several years ago. People reach out to remember him on my birthday but don’t remember that it’s my birthday too.

I will never forget that he died on my birthday, and I appreciate how much he meant to people, but it makes me sad.

I wish ...Read more

Dear Eric: I have a wonderful, spiritual family friend who I have known for more than 20 years. I value her friendship, but she has always been very materialistic and continuously lives through her children and their successes.

I am always supporting her and love her and her family but there are times when she picks a nerve with me because of ...Read more

Dear Eric: I am questioning my decision on whether to go to my brother’s daughter‘s wedding. They live two states away, and I have not seen them for a few years. I love my brother, but I don’t respect or agree with his political choices and views. Except now it feels more like a moral issue because of what is going on currently in our ...Read more