Female sea captains (Lady Gaga, Aidy Bryant, Nasim Pedrad, Noel Wells, Vanessa Bayer, Kate McKinnon, Cecily Strong) abandon their feminine charms, set out on a voyage, resist the temptation of mermen and sing sea shanties....Read More

Dear Abby, A couple of women moved in across the hall from me. One is a middle-aged gym teacher and the other is a social worker in her mid twenties. These two women go everywhere together and I've never seen a man go into...Read More

abdicate (v), to give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.

balderdash (n), a rapidly receding hairline.

carcinoma (n), a valley in California, notable for its heavy smog.

coffee (n), a person who is coughed upon. ...Read More

About 1966 or so, a NASA team doing work for the Apollo moon mission took the astronauts near Tuba City where the terrain of the Navajo Reservation looks very much like the Lunar surface.

Along with all the trucks and ...Read More

*Juan Valdez names his donkey after you

*You get a speeding ticket even when you're parked

*You grind your coffee beans in your mouth

*You sleep with your eyes open

*You have to watch videos in fast-forward

*You lick ...Read More

Buying gifts for men is not nearly as complicated as it is for women. Follow these rules and you should have no problems.

Rule #1: When in doubt - buy him a cordless drill. It does not matter if he already has one. I ...Read More